i couldn't put it any better myself

Did you ever get the feeling that you were all alone
And no one ever knew you and you never had a home
And the lights and the colors do their best to distract you
Screw you
I don't even know why I like you
It's all a blur It's all a blur
It's all a blur It's all a blur
Like a picture It's all a blur
You don't know what you're missing
You don't know what you're missing
I've been trying so hard just to keep away
And now look where I am standing at today
Trying so hard to walk away But it's impossible to watch you fade away
Did you ever stop believing after all was said and done?
When you turned to your friends but they were long gone
And the sky and the snapshots remind you
I trust you and I'm always going to miss you
It's all a blur It's all a blur
Bring it back I said It's all a blur It's all a blur
Like a picture
Reminds me who you were
You don't know what you're missing
You don't know what you're missing
Every time I see you look at me I see those distant eyes
And your looks are fading
And every time you're next to me
I wanna talk and feel
And act like we used to
'Cause everybody knows and everybody cares
Until they're walking in my shoes
And now I know
It's you I fear I'll lose
It's all a blur
And I know you
You can take it all
When I call
Pick up the phone
Like you used to It's all a blur
Like a picture It's all a blur You're just a blur
Trying dying so hard
I've been Dening that I'm not scarred
I've been Crying I am so far
But it's impossible to fill this space
Impossible to take your place
Impossible to watch you fade away

help

i don't think i can do this, i really don't think i can. i don't think i should do this. unfortunatly, i said i would do this. it's one of those things where it seems beyond me. i don't think u left enough of me to be capable of dealing with this....and yet here we r. some1 said it was always in me to be great, is this was she meant?like i'll step it up inspite of myself? tomorrow's gonna come, sunday too, and i'm gonna go despite controversy, i said would. u try saying no to that! how have we come to this? u forced me to leave u, i never wanted to be reunited in such circumstances. this weekend's gonna suck. on the plus side my airconditoning is fixed. too bad the rest of the car isn't.

"i'm not ready for some burned down bridge just yet. don't worry i'll catch u, u were my sweetest downfall."

"sunny day"

so when r u nice to the extent of being a pushover?? what's the line there?? i'm pretty sure it's been crossed. i'm not one to toy with. a lot of stuff has been going on lately. lets see here.

last week. i think it was last week. i went to summerfest, i still dunno y. i've only said how much i hate summerfest a million times. then again the dresden dolls can be very persuading. and the fact i had made plans with my new punk friend. i finally found a girl who's a punk and loves music and shows as much as i do!! i have to say even tho i couldn't see a thing, amanda didn't miss a note! amazing truly, even if she didn't play my fav song.

i just started ripping on the "fans" at summerfest. example, 2 kids on a table sam (friend) goes to stand on the table to look for jason (friend who we kinda lost) " u can't stand there we've been saving this since 2! get off!" says tweedle dumb and dumber. emily (cool punk chick) explains he's just looking for her husband. now these two guys were dressed identical (seemed to be the theme of the nite, dress the same as some1 else) so i chime in "yeah bobsy twins, y don't u just chill and go solve a mystery or something". there is no comeback to that. they're quiet. we find jason.

do u ever have ppl just open up to u?? it keeps happening and i'm not sure y. do i look trustworthy?? i don't mind at all, i like it, and i love that ppl actually want me to listen or help. just kinda weird.

things r going as planned for aux. i just gotta get rid of my car soon. it keeps breaking. actually i outta go get ready for service now. take care all!

random grad pix

u ever have a song that sings just to u?

Quiet now, your voice seems miles away
It’s somehow I hear your song resound
A little bit softer each day
And from my tired heart, a little bit farther away
I’ll sing along
The whole day through
Just do your best to hear me
It’s all you can do
You have my attention
Like you’ve had all the while
Since that first day when you made my heart smile
With loving eyes and tired sighs that flow
You have my attention
Like a shout through an empty sanctuary
Speak but a whisper
I’ll hear a sermon
I’ll sing along, the whole day through
Just do your best to hear me
It’s all you can do
I’ll sing along, the whole night through
While you sleep safely
I’ll be thinking about you
You have my attention

i relate to this band far too well.

tell all ur friends

outta sight outta mind. or so it seems. it's a bit of a challenge to stay involved in everyones lives. it sux. unless of course ur trying to push me out, then just say so and save me the agony of trying to be where i'm not wanted. i was chatting with a person bringing out some click issues i've been seeing and suggested widening out more, becuz it's really a wonderful thing. somehow it got brought out that wideing out can mean leaving ur old friends or some crap like that. or maybe that was just meant towards me. i dunno, i never got it clarified. is that the case? it's not my intention at all, i hate leaving old friends behind (although sadly sometimes u have to)...do my actions show that tho? thought provoking. i tend to not be around a lot, or not see those i really want to enough, i'm terribly sorry. i'll work on that. it's kinda hard to be everywhere at once tho. it goes both ways tho, ppl don't see me and i become non- existant, am i not anything to u unless i'm with u? messed up.

taking back sunday. i'm speechless....mainly cuz i kinda lost my voice a lil from screaming along. it was sooooooooo hot...in both meanings of the word. we danced for the subways, i love their accents!! it was a blast. head automica was ok, the acoustics weren't really to their advantage. angels and airwaves, i'll bring u up to date realy quick with this band. u know blink 182?? dumb question of course u do, everyone does. well this is tom delonge's (singer from blink) new band, he recruited members from i believe boxcar racer and the distillers as well to make something gr8. u expect something special from such well known musicians, they didn't disapoint. there was something in the air when they played. honestly. i moved and could feel static electricty or something everywhere, it was so weird. tbs, wow. i had no idea how gr8 they would be...again. i think having jen there to scream along with me to everything made it that much better, thanx buddie.

well i'm off to catch up on some reading, possibly catch up on mixing some cd's i've promised for ppl, and then well, who knows. it's so gr8 to just sit back and not have anything planned sometimes. i hope it storms. take care all.